Dating Conversation TopicsHolly Bentz
Dating chat strategies for deconstructing the mindset of any date.
Sometimes, I wonder how my friends could know so little about the company they keep. I know more about my clients than my friends know about the men they bed down.
It’s curious how we know the superficial subjects of interest as opposed to the meaningful.
I’m not saying that dating conversations have to evaluate whether America should have entered Iraq or whether Nietzsche was the best philosopher. Evocative dating conversations are comprised of discovering what makes the other person tick.
“What’s your favorite color?” is not a question that provides insight into the person’s soul. Questions which only require a yes or no response offer no value in learning about your date. Here a few examples of poor dating questions:
* Are you close with your family?
* Do you work out?
* Do you cook?
To spice up these questions and get the dating conversation ball rolling, try the following recommendations:
Tell me about the size and dynamics of your family
By posing the family question in this manner, you can find out if your date comes from a large family or if they're a child of divorce.
What's your workout regimen?
Inquiring about fitness can be a delicate subject for some people. As a result, asking the question in a neutral way enables your date, to respond with either, “I never work out..” or “I love pilates…”
What are your signature culinary dishes?
The conversation options from this question may range anywhere from boiling water to fried zucchini.
Posing questions which require a positive or negative answer stifles the opportunity to conjure quality communication. Giving good date talk entails the discovery of where the conversation may take you.
Dating Conversation strategy
Avoid posing yes and no questions. Ask questions that require the person to expound on the topic to learn more about their personality.
If only people took the time to really listen to the people they were dating, the whole mating and relating concept would be – e-a-s-y. I approach dating like an interview. It goes well beyond why a person broke up with a previous lover. Moreover, it exceeds the ho-hum discussion on what type of person are you looking for.
Here are 10-questions that will reveal a lot about a prospective dating partner’s persona and your compatibility.
(1) If you were given seven million dollars, how would you allocate the funds?
If the person mentions sharing the money with their family, it demonstrates that they are family-oriented. The idea is to test the person’s response to demonstrate that you share the same ethics and financial values.
(2) What is your favorite childhood memory?
Although the question reveals their fondest memories, it should be one of the few questions that anyone would answer honestly. The dating strategy here requires studying the other person’s body language during the response to the question. Make a mental note of their honest demeanor to test for body language authenticity.
(3) Which pop icons do you idolize and why?
This question is a good way of measuring your pop culture perspectives. If your date loves Paul McCartney and you abhor him, there may be a few compatibility issues. The question also reveals the personalities they admire.
(4) What’s the craziest transgression you’ve ever committed?
Getting out of control is a subjective issue. What may be deemed as wild to one person maybe mild to the next individual. For example, if your idea of getting crazy is staying up all night doing drugs and playing poker and your date’s idea of insanity is staying up late and watching rerun’s of “Friend’s” there is obviously going to be a compatibility issue.
(5) What is your average daily routine between work and play?
Remember to tailor these questions to your own speaking style. Asking a potential suitor about their daily routine reveals their work life as it details the types of activities the person likes to engage in. Most importantly, it features a little light on how you will fit in the picture.
(6) How would your ex-lovers describe you?
It’s the type of question that can be answered with humor and honesty. If the person tries to divert the question to tout their sexual prowess, be careful. Someone trying to avoid answering this question may be suspect. A person blaming all their exes for their unsuccessful relationships should be another warning sign. Since relationships require mutual work, not one person is guilty of its failure.
(7) If you were not in your current career, what would be your second professional choice – and why?
Is the person happy with their current profession – do they have any other ambitions or secret dreams? For the most part, an individual content in their current career will be more stable-minded. Consequently, they may be ready for relationship opposed to the person who is still searching for what they want to be when they grow up.
(8) What’s your longest dating relationship?
Depending on the age of the person, this dating conversation may spark a little insight into the person’s previous dating history. The objective of the topic is to determine the limits of one’s dating commitment history.
the type of relationship someone has with their family demonstrates the relevancy of close relationships in their life.
(9) In your family relations, who do you have the closest relationship?
Without directly asking someone about their family, this question portrays the important familial bonds of your suitor. Generally, the type of relationship someone has with their family demonstrates the relevancy of close relationships in their life. The reality is – the way someone treats their loved ones is a direct correlation on how they will treat you.
(10) What qualities are important to you about the individuals you date?
Some people have unrealistic expectations, identifying someone with idealistic viewpoints will only prove to be your future rejection. For instance, if he says he always dates models, and you’re a little overweight, don’t expect him to find your baby fat endearing.
The same applies for the woman who deems a six-pack at the top of the priority list. Certain people have physical requirements. If he or she does not have any specific qualities in mind, they may not be ready for a relationship – especially if they are unsure of their objectives.
Since relationships are nurtured via solid communication, posing these dating conversations can save you a great deal of time in deconstructing the mindset of your date.