Love & Respect: The Love She Most Desires; The Respect He Desperately Needs

Love & Respect: The Love She Most Desires; The Respect He Desperately Needs

Emerson Eggerichs

At first blush, it seems that “Love & Respect” might be just another rephrasing of the scores of other relationship self-help books on the market.  And as it holds true to the pillars of its genre’s collective philosophy (proper communication, etc.), it succeeds in being what it is meant to be: a set of proven guidelines which an ordinary person can follow to help better their relationship(s).

While the book succeeds in this respect, the reader finds on closer inspection that the author relies on broad generalizations to support his claims.  Most important of these generalizations is found in the author’s thesis: that men need respect to function properly in a relationship and that women need love.  He is not so bold as to allege that men respond exclusively to respect and women to love, but he suggests that relationships should be built on this foundation.

Is this issue not more complicated than this?  Is the author completely disregarding the fact that many other factors contribute to the health and well-being of a relationship?  I don’t feel that it is such a discrete matter, not one written in such black and white terms.  It’s well known that loving and respecting your significant other stands up as basic rules of relationship propriety, but there are miles of grey area that fall between these umbrella terms. 

“Love & Respect” is a good read for those who are willing to take the author’s message with some thought and reservation.  To take this book too literally is to build a rickety relationship foundation.